Maybe you are annoyed with all those people telling you to be positive. Maybe you just wanna throw pity parties all the time. Maybe you feel like you are not allowed to be sad.
But MAYBE they do have a point. Focussing on the negative isn’t gonna make things any better. Yes, ofcourse bad things happen and ofcourse you’re allowed to feel sad every once in a while, but don’t linger in it for too long. Life sucks, but focussing on the positive things is a great way to trick yourself into thinking it doesn’t.
Here are some tips to master the art of being positive. Actually, I’m not sure if I can help you master them since I suck at it so bad myself.. Soooo, good luck!
- Keep a positivity diary: Try to end your day with writing a few things down that were fun that day, give yourself some compliments or you can do both. You can write anything as long as it’s the positive side of that day. This helps focus on the positive things and makes you see the day in a brighter way. Especially ending your days with this works really well! It might feel stupid at first, but you’ll get used to it.
- Stop the lingering: If you do have a pity party plan an end to it. Try to go do something fun after, to completely get your mind off of things. Whatever works for you.
- Try to hang out with positive people: I know this sounds shitty, I really do.. But it’s true. That’s why people are so allergic to negative people. We all struggle to see the positive things in life and hanging out with people who point out the positive things instead of the negative makes it a little less hard. It’s a team effort everyone! This does NOT mean you should ditch the negative people. You can try to help them see the positive side of things. Try to divide your time between the negative and positive people in a way that you feel you can handle.
- Do things you love/that give you peace: This is a pretty cliché one, but I felt like I had to mention it. It’s really important to create a moment of peace and serenity every day. Try to find at least half an hour a day to do something that’s really just for yourself. It could be literally anything. Here are a few examples if you can’t think of anything: -breathing exercises (could be yoga, but just focussing on breathing in general works great) -watching your favorite tv show -eating your favorite food -create something creative -reading a book -going for a walk -cleaning your room -working out -listening to some music -lighting a scented candle. Well you get the idea. Whatever works for you! However, don’t do stuff that makes you feel good, but gets you in trouble! And don’t do something and then try to instagram it for half an hour. Such a waste of your precious time. Do what you love and do it for you.
- Find your soulmate: Just kidding! Although it does work really well, you can’t rush those things. But love is so much more than just having a relationship. Maybe you love your mom or your cat or your friends. Let your love for them be your motivation to find joy in life. They want to see you happy. Although you shouldn’t let it be a pressure to be happy all the time, it’s okay to have a shitty day. They will love you anyway. And I don’t think your cat will care if you keep feeding him anway.
- Try not to avoid your problems: Sure you can spend all your money and look at it in the most but-it-made-me-happy positive kind of way. But being positive doesn’t mean righting your wrongs and doing it over and over again. You shouldn’t regret doing it, but the right way to think is “Well I can’t change the fact that I did that stupid thing now, but I can try not to do it again.”. It will change your life for the better. Accept you made a mistake, move on and do better next time.
I hope I said something useful and that you will find the happiness you deserve. And remember, the shittiest people are the unhappiest, so try to be forgiving! See you next time!